Mommy Brain: June 2014

Between moving to a new city and our seemingly non-stop traveling (our barely fourteen month old little girl has already been on eight flights—and is scheduled to make another trip out west in just a few short weeks), my blogging has once again fallen to the wayside—but have no fear, you can’t get rid of me that easily! However, while I may have been a royal slacker in the blogisphere, I’ve managed to become a (semi) pro at traveling with a toddler. Our most recent airport adventure was to Ohio for my sister’s wedding (Congrats again, sissy!) so my husband was there to help with the airport hussle and bussle and to help keep our now very mobile toddler at bay. Prior to that trip, Lacey and I took our first solo flight for that same sister’s bridal shower—so I got my first taste of “ just mommy and me”traveling! And at the end of the month, we’re going for round 2—with Lace and I making the cross-country trip all by our lonesome to visit my family in Phoenix while my husband holds down the fort at home (or, you know, works so that we can afford our new fort. Have I mentioned lately how grateful I am for having such a hardworking husband so that I am not only able to stay home with our daughter—but also to travel to see my family several times a year!? Thanks again, babe!). And thanks to having my family spread out across the continent (which I hate), I have managed to gather quite the plethora of travel tips for those few parents who are brave enough to conquer the airport terminals with their babies. So, read on—and enjoy my tried and true (so far!) ideas at making your trip a little less stressful:

1. Prepare, prepare, prepare! Pre-mom me was totally fine with throwing a couple outfits and can’t-live-without essentials into a carry on suitcase the morning of my flight. Nowadays, mom-me (mommy, hahaa!), spends weeks making lists of everything my family may or may not need. I type the lists in to the “notes” feature on my iPhone and then “check” the item off once it’s packed—that way, when I’m returning home from our trip, I can glance at the list again to make sure we haven’t forget anything. (Am I the only one with a serious fear of leaving something—anything—in a hotel room?!)

2. There is no such thing as over-packing. Sure, when you’re making a weekend trip by yourself for a couple of nights, you really don’t need more than one carry-on suitcase (although, that doesn’t stop us from packing an entire suitcase filled with just shoes, does it?). Add just one kid though? And you’ll be shocked at just how much crap you need to bring with you. If we’re going away for 5 days-I pack for 10. With a toddler, you just never know what the day may entail. You may luck out and live in your swimsuit and need nothing else—or, your child could get an awful stomach bug and go through five outfits in one day. I always prefer to be overprepared rather than under—so I plan for anything to happen. Literally “plan for the worst and pray for the best” has become my travel mantra—take it, adopt it, and make it your own, mom.

3. Non-stop flights are your best friend. I would literally rather stay home than have to go through the h-e-double hockey sticks of having to board and re-board with a baby. The odds of keeping a child happy while going through the whole flight process are slim to none as it is—and borderline non-existent for two or more flights in one day. I’ll save my miracle for something else, thank you very much.

4. Check your eff-ing baggage….! For God’s sake, cough up the $25 fee and let the airline deal with the hassle of shuffling your large bags around. You have enough to worry about as it is.

5. …But still, pack a carry-on (or two). Fill one with two days worth of outfit changes for everyone in your family just in case the airline happens to misplace your luggage (like that would everrrrr happen, right?). You don’t want to have to drag your already over-tired children to Target for an emergency shopping spree—there are better times to give them ~~90%~~ 50% of your paycheck than due to lost luggage. Fill a second bag with easy to access baby needs—ie: diapers, food, bottles, and pacifiers. We made the mistake of using our normal diaper bag during our first flight and while it was easy to stuff under the seat, it was too packed to quickly grab what we needed. Now I put just what I’ll need for the flight in a smaller carry on and put my actual diaper bag with all those random extras in my luggage. Yes, it’s a lot of bags (see Tip #7 as well) but if you’re traveling with your partner, you each get a carry on and a small bag. And if you’re traveling by yourself and baby? No one should dare cross you for bringing on one extra small bag.

6. Bring your stroller… or don’t. When Lacey was still an infant, I wouldn’t have dared to head to the airport without bringing my stroller along for the ride. It allowed me to keep her comfortable while also providing a spot to store some of my luggage. Now that she’s incredibly mobile, I wouldn’t dare to attempt to confide her to a stroller before continuing to keep her strapped in to a small seat. On our most recent flight, I let Lacey walk the entire airport to ensure that she was able to stretch out her little legs before cramping them up again. Added bonus: all that walking helped to wear her out too. I did bring my Ergo baby carrier though—just in case all the new sights and people overwhelmed her and she needed to be cuddled and carried (mama still needs her hands to carry all the luggage!). For our trip next month, I’m considering buying a smaller umbrella stroller to bring along as well—but I’m still undecided as to whether it’ll be a help or a hassle.

7. Bring a bag of fun for your little one! Fill it with baby’s favorite toys and add some new and exciting toys in there too. I also load my iPad and iPhone with tons of toddler-friendly apps and download a favorite cartoon or two to watch on the ride. Be prepared to have lots of activities and to switch between them often—I swear a child’s normally short attention span decreases by an infinite amount when traveling.

8. Overnight diapers are your best friend. Even if your flight is only thirty minutes from take-off to touchdown—put your little one in an overnight diaper to make your life much easier. Nursing or giving your baby anything to suck on during departure and arrival is vital to keeping your child’s ears from popping (consider it the equivalent of gum chewing for adults) and keeping you from dealing with a wailing baby the entire flight. And all those extra liquids are sure to keep your little one’s bladder flowing—the extra absorbency of the overnight diapers will lessen your chance of having to attempt to change a diaper on the airplane—which is something that, trust me, you want to avoid if at all possible (take it from someone who once had to change over five poopy diapers during a four hour flight—those bathrooms are small and it super sucks).

9. Consider paying for an extra seat. Yes, one of the glorious things about having a“new” child is the free perks they receive: meals, admission to theme parks and sporting events, and yes, free flights until age two. But just cause it’s cheap, doesn’t mean it’s easy. So yes, shelling over the extra cash for your child to have their own seat is pricy and no, I haven’t done it—but I will say, the times I’ve lucked out and had an empty seat next to me made my life so much easier. I was able to nurse during takeoff without the fear of exposing myself to my unknowing neighbor, while also giving Lacey some extra legroom during her (hopeful) nap. The price probably isn’t worth it for most intercontinental flights but if you’re traveling across the border, it’s something to seriously consider. Most flights also offer extra leg room seats for a small price as well— since children under 15 can’t be in the infamous emergency exit row (and therefore, extra room row), it’s a good option for parents of space-hogging children to check out.

10. Schedule flights around sleep times. If possible, I try to only purchase flights that are around Lacey’s naptimes (or for our longer, cross country flights, I try to schedule them at bedtime to ensure that she’ll sleep for the duration of the flight). Under no circumstances do I let Lacey take a nap before a flight—I literally pull out all the stops to keep her from falling asleep on the way to the airport. Sure, she is guaranteed to kick and scream all the way to the gate—and yes, my fellow passengers shoot me evil looks as they silently pray they’re not seated anywhere nearby. But trust me, those strangers will be thanking you for your excellent parenting skills when your child is asleep by take-off (and if you’re lucky, stays asleep the whole flight!).

11. Reserve ahead of time. Look at the seats available when you first book your flight and reserve, reserve, reserve! Passengers flying with children can pre-board with zone 2 (or earlier if you request assistance) so pick a seat that works best for you and your family—regardless of zoning preference. I personally always like to sit in the back of the plane so there’s more privacy and fewer distractions for my fellow travelers. You’ll quickly notice that many traveling families follow this unwritten rule—and hey, it’s nice to have like-minded ~~zombies~~ parents surrounding you. If you’re really lucky, your little one just might make a new pint-sized friend and keep themselves occupied throughout the entire plane ride.

12. Don’t be afraid to speak up. My last and probably most important advice to you: don’t be afraid to ask for help. Are all those bags becoming too hard to carry? Ask for assistance. If you didn’t pay for an extra seat but see an empty row anywhere on the plane, ask if you can move. Need a blanket because you forgot one and the plane is (as always) freezing? Ask the stewardess. Trust me when I say that this is one time when literally everyone around you wants your child to be happy—because if they’re not, it’s affecting their peaceful plane ride as well.

*Bonus* Ask for wings! It took Lacey flying eight times before a kind stewardess offered us her first pair of wings—I had actually assumed they didn’t offer them anymore. It may be a small gesture but those wings are a great reminder of your baby’s first flight—and your excellent job of surviving it! Congrats mom and dad! You did it!

Of course, you know you’re child best—sure, nonstop flights are my personal saving grace—but maybe your child needs a break in between flights to stretch their legs (and their lungs). If you’re not sure what will work best for you, try keeping a log of your baby’s moods throughout a typical day—when are they least likely to have a major meltdown? Book accordingly. Or hop in the car and take a long car-ride. Did baby do okay? Or did he need a break (or five?). Take it all in to consideration when scheduling your“vacation.” And honestly, no amount of preparation is going to make up for experiencing it yourself. So if you’re considering taking a trip with your little one but afraid to make the leap? Just do it. It may suck—okay, it’ll almost definitely suck for at least a couple moments—but it’ll be worth it. And like all of parenting, the more you do it, the easier it will be—and before long, it’ll be second nature. That is, until you have multiple kids and attempt to fly by yourself—and at that point, you’re just crazy and on your own. Kidding, of course—kinda.;)

Have you traveled with your little one? Any other tips that you would add to the list? Are you one of those “crazy” moms who have flown with multiples and without your partner? How’d you manage to survive? Leave a comment and let me know!

See you real soon (…or at least soon-ish),

Lacey’s mama

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